GLOGtoberfest 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th - Guns, Blood, Goblins, and Swirling Rainbow Vortices

On G_d, I'm doing the GLOGtoberfest challenge all the way through. 

GUNS

GLOGtoberfest the 1st is guns. There are already a bunch of good posts about guns and classes about guns, so I figure I can't just do another class or list of guns.

My big-structural-paradigm-brain is running a little smooth tonight, so we're just going to make a list of strange bullets instead of something bigger and wilder.

1. Mind Bullets.
   Strange, translucent bullets, flickering like an old TV screen.
   When mind bullets hit a target, the target suffers no damage, but until you next reload, it is to them as if they had been shot. They will suffer pain, clutch at their wounds, possibly even "die," but suffer no physical harm.
2. Bumper Bullets.
   Heavy, blue-painted rounds, smooth and rounded on the end.
   Bumper bullets deal no damage; instead, when they strike a living target, the target is launched 30 feet in whatever the direction the bullet was fired from. At the target's option, they can make a save (probably STR) to either halve or double that distance.
3. Piercer Rounds.
   Bullets with a flat end and no shell casing.
   Piercer rounds, when fired, will travel forward exactly 1000 feet and then stop. They will pierce through literally anything in their way, be it flesh, wood, stone, water, fire, or any other substance.
4. Sanguinosuppressor Rounds.
   Black bullets with no sheen to their metal.
   When sanguinosuppressor rounds are fired, they make no sound, the target does not bleed, and the target feels no pain or pressure on impact. The bullet hole is still visible, and if someone jams their fingers in the hole they can feel the bullet, but the target won't register the bullet hitting them from pain or impact.
5. Stake Shot.
   Spiky, shiny, hexagonal bullets; sharp to the touch.
   When a stake shot hits something and stops moving, a three-foot metal stake grows out of the back of the bullet. 
6. Time Lag Bullets.
   Ordinary bullets, but with a symbol of a clock etched onto the casing.
   When fired, time lag bullets move forward enough to clear the muzzle of the gun, but no further. You can them move them around however you please and place them wherever. When you next reload, the bullets will launch forward with all the force and power as if they were just fired, oriented towards the front of the bullet.
7. Recycler Rounds.
   Green-tinged gunmetal bullets with rifling around their edges.
   When you shoot a recycler round and it doesn't hit a living target, the bullets will land and then slowly roll back to your gun, automatically reloading themselves; if you reload, the bullets will stop moving.
8. Resurrection Rounds.
   Perfectly-constructed even bullets, encased in pale bone.
   When you kill a target using resurrection rounds, upon next reloading, the target returns to life at 1 HP. 
9. Messenger Shot.
   Silvery bullets covered in dozens of tiny glyphs.
   Before firing a messenger shot, you can whisper a single word to it. Three seconds after being fired, that word will appear written, based on wherever the bullet was fired: if it was into the sky, it appears like a flair or skywriting; if it was into wood or concrete, it appears as cracks or carvings; if it was into flesh, it appears written in blood or as a fresh wound. You can whisper multiple words to multiple shots to get a whole sentence.
   
10. Carrion Bullets.
    Slightly-barbed bullets splattered with red.
    If you kill a target with a carrion bullet, fish the bullet out of their carcass, and then eat it, you regain 1d4 HP and count as having eaten enough food for one day.

OK, cool. That's October 1st, guns, done.

BLOOD

GLOGtoberfest the 2nd is blood. I'm making another one of my comedy-body-horror-with-a-generic-last-name classes, called Bloody Gonzalez. This one's going in its own post, since this post is going to be long enough as is.

Here's the link: Bloody Gonzalez.

That's October 2nd, blood, done.

GOBLINS

GLOGtoberfest the 3rd is goblins. 

Everyone knows that goblinism is contagious. Goblinism is most common in "orphans, urchins, drunkards, wastrels, and particularly cunning feral dogs," but really, just about anyone catch a case of goblinism.

Contracting Goblinism

Every day you're in close contact with a goblin or goblins, roll 1d20. If the result is a 2 or lower, you contract goblinism.

For each of the following that is true, subtract 1 from the d20 roll:

• You don't bathe regularly
• You can't spell correctly
• You speak in a cockney accent, or similar
• You have a predilection for theft
• You've made and wielded a shiv
• You've eaten food out of a dumpster, bin, trash heap, or dungeon

For each of the following that is true, add 1 to the d20 roll:

• You are of noble blood, or are otherwise well-bred
• You have a proper education
• You are considered attractive or comely
• You think theft is unethical
• You vomit easily, or have a quick gag reflex

As you can see, goblinism is far more common in some people than others. (My own Scavver, for example, would be quite likely to catch a case of goblinism.)

Symptoms of Goblinism

As soon as you contract goblinism, and then every month after (or week, if your game is on a shorter timeframe), you gain 1 goblin feature, 1 goblin quirk, and 1 goblin perk. If you roll a repeat, that particular trait doubles in effect.  (Many of these lifted from the Goblan.)

Goblin features:

1. Your nose and ears grow longer and more pointed
2. Your skin takes on a swampy greenish pallor
3. Your eyes take on a bright yellow tinge
4. You shrink 1d6 inches and have a more hunched posture
5. Your voice and mannerisms take on a cockney twang
6. You grow thinner and lankier, particularly in the fingers and joints
7. Your nails and teeth grow longer, sharper, and more yellowed
8. You gain a slowly-increasing fascination for small shiny things

Goblin perks:

1. You can see a few feet in front of you while in the dark
2. You can smell accurately up to about 20 feet in front of you
3. You gain +1 to rolls to avoid large oncoming sources of damage, like spinning saw blades or fireballs
4. You gain +1 to rolls to avoid large oncoming sources of responsibility, like special missions or prison sentences
5. Your teeth are sharp enough that they can be used as a weapon (as dagger, probably)
6. Once per day, if you need one, you can always find a small weapon, like a dagger or hatchet
7. One corpse you loot per day has an extra 1d10 copper pieces on it
8. Choose one bug: spiders, centipedes, flies, beetles, roaches, worms. Those bugs are friendly to you, and you always have at least one on you.

Goblin quirks:

1. You physically cannot spell words correctly
2. If something has gone missing, everyone immediately suspects it's you, even NPCs who have never met you before
3. You smell terrible, like a marsh-drenched drain-dog, always
4. You have to make a save to resist uncontrollably eating sweet things
5. If you have one drink, you get drunk, no matter what
6. If an NPC (or PC) ever decides to pick a party member to bully or harass, it's always you
7. You always have fleas, ticks, and other pests in and on your clothes and body
8. Shopkeepers, bartenders, priests, and other NPCs will throw you out of respectable establishments if you step foot inside them

Curing Goblinism

If someone has four or fewer of each of the traits, they can be cured of goblinism. 

To cure someone of goblinism, they must be bathed, groomed, dressed in respectable clothing, attend a fancy dinner, and then sit through some kind of cultural event (usually an opera), and they must do it all while maintaining proper etiquette and a polite demeanor. Usually, this requires the patient to want to cure their goblinism, although patients can occasionally be forcibly cured as well.

If someone has more than four of each of the traits, they can be cured of goblinism, but they must do each of the activities for an entire week in succession, rather than just a single night. Additionally, they must have the most choice options for at least one night: delicate bath perfumes, a fresh haircut, the latest fashion, the most delectable meals, high art opera, and perfect decorum throughout.

If a person has all eight of each of the features, perks, and quirks, they become a full goblin, and thus are incurable.

Bam. October 3rd, goblins, done.

SWIRLING RAINBOW VORTICES

Octoberfest the 4th is swirling rainbow vortices. 

This, to me, is a spell. 

Swirling Rainbow Vortices

R: 50'

T: point(s) in space

D: concentration

You conjure [dice] swirling rainbow vortices, each of which is a portal to another realm.

For each vortex, roll 1d6 on [dice] of the following tables (so 1 die means only roll on the first, 2 dice means the first and second, and so on):

A portal to...

1. Hell
2. The Plane of Air
3. Deep underground tunnel networks
4. The palace of the nearest emperor
5. The Astral Sea
6. Home

...more specifically, within that realm, it's a place...

1. To withstand foes and attacks
2. To rest and recuperate
3. To feed
4. To socialize with others
5. To hold rituals, sacred or profane
6. To be alone from the rest of the world

...but this portal...

1. Sucks people and objects in from up to 25' away
2. Spits people and objects 50' out the other side
3. Opens and closes every 10 seconds
4. Re-paints anything that goes through it a different color of the rainbow
5. Transforms all metal that passes through it into gold
6. Swaps one language of anything that passes through it to another

...but this portal ALSO...

1. Has two more traits from the 3rd table
2. Can be moved at will
3. Sends you forward 1d6 days in time
4. Is one-way only
5. Re-rolls the first two dice every minute
6. Has all of the above traits

Essentially, every die you spend adds another portal and makes each portal increasingly complicated and specific.

Kind of a goofy beast. But yeah, that's October 4th, swirling rainbow vortices, completed.

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That's the first round of GLOGtoberfest done. We'll see what the next round holds.